Our Loves Ones On Loan from God

One of the points in our GriefShare last Monday night was the discussion that our loved ones are a gift from God to have for a time before going back to God. This thought comes from Job 1:21 - " . . . "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised." God gives life and in giving life gives us our children and our spouses. They are not ours to keep but to enjoy for the time we have them. Then God will take them back to our true home--with Him.

This helps in the grieving process to understand Jerry was never mine to keep. God let me have him for 50 years of marriage and 77 years of life, but he belonged to God. Jerry's life was long by most standards while others die very young. We don't understand the reasons of why some people live just a few days or months and others many years. My dad lived to almost 97. God's timing is perfect but it is rarely our timing. It takes tremendous trust.

Life as a widow is not the life I chose to live and yet that is where I find myself--alone and single again. There are certainly lots of widows in the world so am not alone in that sense. Some widows adjust better than others. Some look to remarry quickly to not be alone. Others embrace their single life and move forward with their lives. 

The biggest key in the scripture from Job is the last part of the verse. After Job acknowledged God had given him much in his life but then had taken it all away from him, he continued to praise God. As I look at Job's situation losing all his children and possessions, I am not sure I would have had the same attitude of praise for God. My first thought would be to turn away wondering why God would allow all this to happen to one of His servants. 

A quote from Charles Stanley's Life Applications Bible explains praise this way:

"The greater your praise, the smaller your problems will appear. The more frequent your praise, the less you will find yourself with time to worry or feel anxious. The more you praise Him, the more you are going to see things worthy of His praise. As you exalt Him, your entire attitude will shift from an unhealthy, 'I focus' and 'problem focus,' to a healthy and joyful 'God focus' and 'answer focus.' So take a cue from the prophet Isaiah and proclaim: 'O Lord, You are my Go, I will exalt you, I will give thanks to Your name; for you have worked wonders, plans formed along ago, with perfect faithfulness' (Is. 24:1)."

What all this says to me is I am to praise God every day in my grieving. I am to praise God in my loneliness. I am to praise God in the adjustment to the life as a widow. I am to praise God!

Today I am grateful for:

1. The gift of Jerry to me for 50 years of marriage.
2. The gift of my children to me for (at this point) 42 and 45 years.
3. The gift of my grandchildren.
4. The gift of the precious 8-month-old twin  boys I help with every Thursday night.
5. A beautiful summer day in Oklahoma--not too hot or humid.
6. Lunch with my daughter, Lynn, and then going through Jerry's music.
7. Meeting the 5-year old son of the tile layer for my bathroom.
8. A day at home to work on projects and write on my book.
9. Good sleep at night.
10. The reminder to praise God no matter what is going on in my life.

Here is a picture of my sweet Jerry with 2 of our grandchildren. This was taken the month we lost him last December. These are 3 of my gifts!