Yes, I Am Still Here!

It has been 2 weeks since I last posted. My sister-in-law, Shirley, was here from California for those 2 weeks. We had a super visit, but it left little time for posting. We shared a lot of grieving stories as her husband (Jerry's older brother) died 3.5 months after Jerry did. Shirley and I now have a close bond.

We shared what we miss the most about not having our husbands with us. For her getting ready to come on this trip, she had to pack for herself. Marvin, her husband, would always pack her suitcase for her when she left on trips. These Cox men were good packers. Jerry could always get more in a smaller space than I could. We miss having to figure out things on our own without having our guy to run things by. We miss holding hands during prayers at church and at home. We just miss having them around!

One of the things we enjoyed doing together was go to a high school musical. We also enjoyed eating out together. These are difficult to do alone and just not any fun. When she first arrived, we drove over to Searcy, AR to see some friends from California who had retired to Searcy. It was great getting to know Martha and Charlie.

Here in Oklahoma City, I took her to see the memorial for the bombing of the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building on April 19, 1995. It is a sacred place where so many died senselessly because of one man and his hatred. Across the street from the memorial is a church with the statue pictured below. Beneath the statue, it simply states, "And Jesus wept." All those people who say, "Where was God when this happened?" The statue says it all. He was crying with his Father in heaven over the pain His children were feeling.

   
Shirley and I also talked about what we do now. This quote was in my readings this week: "Our days are only worth living when the Lord is the director of them." Shirley and my lives have been completely turned upside down. All the things we did as a couple are now done as a single. However, if we turn over our lives completely to God, He will direct where He wants us to go and what He wants us to do. While Shirley was here, I spoke twice on Caregiving. It is truly awesome to share God's amazing care of us with others. I am praying God will bless that effort even more.

Psalm 48:14 - "For that is what God is life. He is our God forever and ever, and he will guide us until we die." How comforting to know God is always there in our past, present, and future. His guidance of our lives doesn't ever stop unless we stop it. We always have the option of taking back the reigns and living our lives without His guidance. May each of us daily turn our lives over to God's guidance.

Today I am grateful for:

1. Sweet memories of Jerry and Marvin.
2. Many tears over the last few weeks as my grieving continues and continues. Grieving means I loved someone dearly so thankful for the grief.
3. The wonderful visit I had with Shirley.
4. Beautiful fall colors in the trees.
5. Cool fall temps.
6. Getting to go to the musical Oklahoma tomorrow night for Oklahoma Christian's homecoming this weekend.
7. Visiting an old friend this week we knew in Tulsa, Dot.
8. God's never changing being.
9. Jesus weeping over our pain--how special that is.
10. God's direction in my life.