What's It Like?

Someone posted this on Facebook. The thoughts are those I can relate to in my new journey.

It may be too small to easily read especially if you are reading this on your phone or tablet. I will expand on what it says. Yes, everything in my world changed the day Jerry went to his angel choir. Tonight I actually cooked an entire meal! Normally, I just grab something simple. Some meals, I will just steam some vegetables, eat some cheese and crackers, or have fruit. It is just no fun to cook for one. We were never TV watchers and certainly never ate with the TV even on much less in front of it. Now, I try to time when I eat with the afternoon/evening news. Watching it as I eat doesn't seem as lonely.

My circle of friends definitely changed. As a single and no longer a couple, people don't include you the way they used to do. I have friends I meet for lunch the same, but when it comes to doing things in the evening, it is a totally different ball game. I am still looking for people to do things with in the evenings. Jerry isn't around to go to dinner, the show, the theater, or even just to the park.

My job situation was non-existent when Jerry passed away because of the caregiving. With the marvelous testimony God gave me to share His providence in the 22 months, I don't feel as lost or helpless as some others might feel. The three talks I have given have been very well received.It gives me a tremendous sense of worth for God to be using me in this way.

The last part of this section I do not feel describes me as it might other new widows. Yes, it is hard, but I have my heavenly support team holding me up every day. I have never felt alone even when I am not with someone physically. My travels have been a wonderful way to get out and see people we hadn't been able to visit in years due to Jerry's arthritis before the stroke. God has blessed me in so many ways with excellent health, an independent streak to travel alone, and a purpose in sharing our testimony.

Psalm 121:5-8 - "The Lord watches over you--the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm--he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore." This scripture promises God's care to continue as a widow and even into eternity. My life is different for sure; however, my God is the same now and forevermore. I have nothing to fear as He promises to keep me from harm. Does that mean something terrible will never happen to me? No, I could have a car wreck on my next trip but the result would be a heavenly home reunited with Jerry. That doesn't sound so bad! As a Christian, we win whether we live or die to this life.

Today I am grateful for:

1. A little cooler temperatures--below 100!
2. An afternoon nap in Jerry's recliner.
3. Walking and talking this morning with Kelly Ann.
4. Seeing my first Monarch of the season in the garden today.
5. About 7 chrysalises now formed in my Black Swallowtail butterfly house! What fun.
6. Never feeling alone with God by my side.
7. Planning my September trip with lots of people to see.
8. A real dinner cooked with chicken and vegetables.
9. Getting my new laptop set up.
10. My Lord watching over my all the time protecting from harm.

Widowhood is not the life I chose but singing in the heavenly choir for Jerry is certainly great for him!